No one really counts days unless they are missing something or anticipating a return of something or expecting something forthcoming.
No one counting but my brothers and sisters. We have. We have been counting. The days, the weeks, and months. My siblings and I have been counting the times that have shorten us from a mother’s love, a mother’s moment of embrace, a lecture, a meal, and a presence. You name it, we are lacking it.
The gift of time is such an essence. I love this poem and will share it with you, again.
“5 THINGS YOU CANNOT TAKE BACK
A stone after it’s thrown,
a word once it is spoken,
an occasion once it is missed,
an action when it is done,
and time once it has passed.”
–Author unknown
After passing hundreds of days, today we embark our first ever hump.
And we did it! You helped us! Yeah you, and you, and you! We did it with God’s grace and dignity. God’s overwhelming love of challenges and sacrifice. God’s blessings of true friendship, kinship, and unity in the hearts of many, many people of all kinds that truly loves us, the ones that are motherless, the fatherless, and the weaken in spirits. The kind of love that makes you so weak that when you talk about how much love–you’d cry first without spitting any words out of your mouth. Your love friends and families, it was precious and Thank You from all our hearts!
Mom missed on some of life’s biggest and best occasions; such as my brother’s wedding to his closing of his new home. My middle brother, the one she had the most conversations with, the one she feared life pressed too hard on, and him the one she drew closer to as life was pulling her away.
She missed the enjoyment of another brother’s new home in Newport. The one she lived with for five short months, and had a huge garden visionary in the backyard come spring. She missed seeing how hard my sister-in-law would have to clean four bathrooms on multiple floors. She missed out on the scheduled dinners and many birthdays that were claimed by each member of her family through out the calendar year. Oh Mom!
However, mom did not miss out on how ugly the world became. How the government had ran or closed down many of our most shopped stores like Sears because of finances. She did not miss out on her dialysis center’s decision to relocate to Woodbury. Mom doesn’t miss her eighteen pills being split into morning and afternoon shifts, and she definately did not miss seeing how stretched out this winter was in Minnesota. Oh, you know because the cold chilling winds would have hurted her bones.
She however, has missed seeing chapters on broken relationships coming together for the first times between siblings. She has missed how her death has unsettled some bickerings in families and some are picking up pieces again between fathers and daughters and his sons. She has missed how her widowed husband will carry on. She will miss an entire year again of her grandchildren’s growth and their yearning for a grandmother’s love eachtime someone else talks about their grandma.
Furthermore, She will miss my youngest brother’s college graduation and his speech he is about to make at his party without her. Just how many times, will we endure the without yous?
The year commemorate many chapters of short pages and some rather long ones. People do not count the days, they really do count the moments. But no one really counts days unless they are missing something.
Love you mom, forever engraved in our hearts. Not a day, without you in our thoughts. 03/20/2018.
let's mangle 